CCChat April 2025.pdf - Flipbook - Page 23
This was a few years ago and when Amy
reported him to the police for stalking, she was
laughed at. “I would like to think that the police
would handle it differently, if it happened today. I
was terrified for months, expecting him to jump
out and attack me. I did not feel safe but wasn9t
able to evidence why I felt unsafe.=
MR SYNCHRONICITY
During their relationship, Diana’s ex would
always try and convince her that they were
destined to be together. “He would ring or text
me at certain times like 2:22, or 4.44 and claim it
was a sign from the Universe that we were meant
to be together. I didn9t really pay much attention
to it when we were together because I just
thought it was a bit silly, but when I left and he
began bombarding me with long, horrid texts
and emails, I started getting really anxious and
dreading those times, as I knew there would be
another batch of abusive and manipulative
messages from him.=
THE MOULDER
Sally was in a relationship with someone who
moulded her into his idea of what he wanted. < It
started off innocently enough with him telling me
that he preferred one dress over the other or my
hair in a certain way, but gradually it became
more and more. When I put on weight with
pregnancy, he would hold me and get hold of
my 8love handles9 and instead of telling me what
he preferred, it became about what he didn9t like.
He told me he found my pregnant body repulsive
and started comparing me to thin women we
knew or in the street. After our daughter was
born, he told me to lose weight or he would
divorce me and, over time, my self confidence
just disappeared.=
THE BLAME-SHIFTER
Hannah was in a relationship with someone
who, or so she thought, was always willing to
accept responsibility for what they did, and she
considered herself lucky to be with someone
who was willing to work on their relationship.
As time passed, Hannah realised that each time
there was a conversation where her partner was
prepared to work on something, they would
immediately put in a proviso- I will look at this
but you need to work on this.
Hannah eventually realised that every time the
conversation was about her partner, for example
leaving the house for the day, with the door
unlocked, or leaving the tap dripping whilst the plug
was in the bath, the blame was always shifted onto
her and what she had done instead. So even though
her partner had started off by accepting
responsibility, Hannah eventually realised that they
were able to avoid any accountability because they
would immediately focus on Hannah’s perceived
flaws and expect Hannah to make the changes.
THE SABOTEUR
Molly’s ex went out of his way to create
unpleasantness on her birthday and for every special
occasion where he was not being centred.
“I am still unable to fully enjoy my birthday because I
still remember all the times my birthday was ruined.
There was the time he drove me into the countryside
for a romantic walk and then stopped the car and
asked me to walk home because my perfume was
making him feel ill. Another year, we went to a
restaurant and, out of the blue, he caused a scene and
stormed out. On yet another birthday, we were driving
to a restaurant and on the way, he broke up with me,
yet still expected us to eat there. I arrived there in tears,
unable to eat because I was so upset but him insisting
we stay there as he had made an effort for my birthday.
For one anniversary, he had booked a lovely hotel and
on the morning we were due to check out, he told me
that he had not paid for the food or drinks, just the
room, and that I needed to pay the tab. He would
always apologise profusely the next day but it got to
the point where I didn9t want to do anything on my
birthday, and he would then become angry saying
that he had taken a lot of time to make my birthday
special and, well, guess what….. oops, he did it again!=
ALL NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED
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